Don’t Lose Yourself During A 10 min Storm 

I woke up today on a mission to center myself. I want to get back to my maximum productivity level and make some major leaps by the end of the week. So I woke up today and completed task after task, but half way through my day I saw the storm clouds forming. I knew I could make at least one more stop before the rain hit so I raced from seeing one patient onto the highway to see another. 

As I jumped on the highway I received a phone call that threw me off and put me into auto-pilot. I turned onto the wrong highway and only realized it 2-3 exits in. I immediately jumped off and turned around, but by this time it began to drizzle. My worst fear was slowly coming to life: being stuck on the highway in a torrential down pour between trucks and fast driving people. 

I got onto the right highway and only had a few miles to go when the rain started. It was not just side winds and rain, but the blinding, “I can’t see the car in front of me” type of rain. I turned on my hazards, slowed down, and began to pray. As I started praying I saw the sun right at the exit I needed to get off of, but the rain was still coming down. I took a deep breath and calmed my sprit. I prayed, “God I do not want to die in a 10 minute storm.” God replied, “Well calm down and stop focusing on the current storm, but instead focus on the sunshine just ahead.” I immediately knew this lesson was bigger then me freaking out while driving, but instead a lesson to be applied in life. 

Your day may start off perfect and a passing storm may come through, but it is up to you to stay focused and pass through this storm with grace. Recognize the short storms, settle your spirit, pray and keep progressing. Do not lose yourself over a 10 minute storm. 

Keep driving. Be you. Do you. Tell your own story. On your own terms. 

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What is Your Soul Telling You

My soul is telling me that my life is my own and I do not owe anyone anything. My soul is telling me that if I do not learn patience, then I will never get beyond where I am today. My soul is telling me that fear is an excuse to keep you from following your dreams. My soul is telling me that the more I pour into others, the more God will pour into me. My soul speaks to me and even when I do not listen, my soul continues to guide me in the right direction until I can finally accept my truth.

The power of meditation and silence allows you to stop going through the motions and truly find purpose in your movements. Meditation gives you an opportunity to explore your yesterday and prepare for right now. Societal pressures keeps us on edge and living with expectations, instead of appreciating and learning from our present place in life. Being in tune with your self, the universe, and your purpose is necessary to match your worldly experience with your spiritual journey. There are not two opportunities at this life, but one that is essential to making the world go round.

I have resisted against my own thoughts on the issues of church, raising my child, and caring for self. I have allowed tradition, how I was raised, and the opinions of others to push me to be someone who I do not desire to be. I tried to attend church weekly and although the structure was good for my son, I did not feel like I was giving him the best experience. I want to teach my son the word through life experiences. When you read Matthew 25:34-40, you begin to understand that God is not in a building, but He is in his people. We talk about serving God, but we refuse to serve his people. We skip over the homeless, the hungry, and the broken to go to church and seek the God that is right outside the church door. I do not judge those who attend church regularly, because there is power in the synergy of like minded people worshipping and praising at the same time. I simply have decided to walk this journey along a different path until God leads me to the church that He wants me to take root in.

I did a short video on my experience with God and in that moment so many of my lingering questions were answered. This woman touched my soul in a place that was hidden behind the chaos of everyday life. She brought me back to a place I have been fighting against, and assured me that I am where I am supposed to be and I was doing what I am supposed to be doing. My mission will not be complete until I do what I am supposed to be doing. I do not seek a following, I do not seek to be an example, I only seek to walk my ordered steps. There is something or someone out there waiting for me and I have to find them and pour into them. My purpose is to serve and to raise my son in a lifestyle of constant service.

My soul is telling me to do the work of the Lord until there is no more work to do. I am now looking forward to Sundays again and taking my walk to another level. This is not about anything but love. That is what my soul is telling me.

#ServiceSundays. Be you. Do you. Tell your own story. On your own terms.

Just BE

How many of us are living the life that has been defined by someone else? How many of us are breathing stale air and reminiscing on forgotten dreams? I continuously question my purpose, my passion, and my place in this world. I decided to stop chasing after the “American Dream” and to focus more on being. Being present, being passionate, being happy, being grateful. I am no longer here to operate in the narrow halls of societies definition of life, but to expand my presence to cover as much space as possible.

We get so caught up in trying to obtain something that we miss out on the experience, the lessons, the journey. We wish for the end at the beginning and refuse to appreciate the process.  The struggle is real, but it is also the place where we grow the most. We plant a seed and we want it to grow right now, but in reality there is an entire process that has to take place before the seedling can even breakthrough the soil.  Even after seedlings have broken through the hard ground, they are not ready to be harvested.  There is still more cultivation of the crop that has to take place.

The work that it took to prepare the ground, till the ground, and protect the crop is tiresome.  If any steps are missed, all of the handwork that you put into the harvest will be wasted.  At every step of the process it may not seem that the work that you are putting in is worth it, but you have to remember why you even took the first step down this road. Be where you are. Be in that moment. Be aware. Be awake. Be engaged. You are here for a reason that is greater than this moment. Just BE.

Every step may not be easy, but every step is worth. Make sure you are walking in the right direction and not going backwards because you cannot see what is next. Take a moment and be grateful. Count your blessings. Express gratitude for your today.

Just BE. Be you. Do you. Tell your own story. On your own terms.

Who Are You? 

Nobody could have told me this is who I would be ten years ago. I had to find myself through all of my ups and downs. I had to retreat from the noise and search for the best me many times. I had to look at myself in the mirror and face my weaknesses. No one can tell you who you are. People can speak life or death over your life, but you are the ultimate connection between whether you will succeed or fail.

Never take the words of someone and use them as the catalyst to your success or the excuse to fail. Do not quote someone else in your weakest moments. Listen to what God is saying to you. The message is personal and will get you out of that dark space much faster than quoting others who have succeeded. 

The truth I live is mine to profess and to share. I hope that it inspires you to find your truth, share it, and inspire those around you. Many of us are hanging on to the tailwinds of successful people’s words instead of searching for our own deeper connection. You cannot get to the top off of someone else’s fumes. Create your own path and see how easier it is to navigate to the next level. 

When I ask who you are, I am not asking for physical attributes, personal characteritistics, or family ties. Those things are a piece of the puzzle, but who you truly are lies in your purpose. The greatest and only reason you were created on this earth. You have to find that reason and live it. The confusion we have at forks in the road is because we are trying to follow someone else’s path instead of knowing who we are and following the path created for us. 

I stopped praying for material things many years ago. I never asked God for a house, a car, or money. I asked that His will be done, that favor rain down upon me, that my steps be ordered and for peace and wisdom. These intangibles have opened up more doors than having tangibles that weren’t going to get me closer to my truth and purpose in life.  The material things will come when you are where you are supposed to be. 

Many people want the manifestation of the work before they put in any labor. You want to look the part, but refuse to live the part. Who are you mirroring yourself after? Who are you trying to prove yourself too? Why must people see you? When you have a gift and you are walking in your truth, your gift should be the priority. Like a lamp unto your feet and a light unto your path. When you are walking along your own path, everyone will be able to see you. When you are walking down the crowded path, you have to fight for attention. You have to talk loud, you have to dress loud, and assimilate to those who surround you. 

I realized I did not have to fight when I was where I was supposed to be. I did not have to break down doors and compromise my vision to be in a room full of shells. I could run in circles of power without feeling uncomfortable about where I was and where I was headed. There was no hierarchy. We all deserved to be here as can only help each other go higher. 

Everyone will not believe in your dream, but the few special people who do are the ones you have to cherish. The amazing souls that can see the flicker in your eye and sense your heart beating faster when you speak are your assets. The company you keep should reflect where you are going, not where you came from. Know who you are and focus on fulfilling your purpose. Everything else is a waste of time. 

Who are you? Who am I? Ask yourself. Accept the answer. Ride to the moon. No limits. Be you. Do you. Tell your own story. On your own terms. 

I am Finally in the Place

I am finally in the place where everything is working together for my good not because I deserve it, or because I earned it, but because I endured it. 

My boss told me to listen to a T.D. Jakes message (Do It) and spoke about how it motivated him to move forward on some major things in his life. I listened to it last week and for the most part it was just a good message. But when the message hit the 57 minute mark, I knew why I needed to listen until the end. It was Jakes’ last point on triumph that spoke to my current situation. The message was so powerful that I had to listen to that message again and again it spoke to my spirit in a special way. 

I can walk through this phase of my life fearless, because even if someone attempts to take my spot they cannot take my place. Although I am careful of who I share my ideas  and future projects with, I know that this is my time and my success does not hinge on someone else’s failure. There is enough room in the kingdom for everyone to prosper, so others may replicate but it will simply be a copy of something that is not going to get you to your place. It is not my battle to worry about others and to simply focus on the task at hand. 

I can look back and appreciate all that I went through was not mere punishment, but God moving me closer to this place.  Those situations were not even blessings, but place markers that show me how far I have come.  I speak often of growing up without my mother, having no relationship with my father, struggling to pay for college every semester and feeling alone even when I was surrounded by people. Every time I asked why, I never received an answer, but I would always receive encouragement that it was all going to work out for my good. So here I am basking in the glory of His promises. 

I never focused too long on what was going on and could not even fathom why these things were going on, but this trip has made me see that Gods plans were greater than my imagination. I told my husband yesterday that no one could have told me this is where I would be at 28, and I know in a few weeks, months, and years I will be in a house that I did not build, in vineyards that I did not grow, and harvesting crops I did not plant. 

It is not always about the specific acts, but the manner in how you carry yourself through the valleys and over the mountains. Sometimes we wonder why our actions don’t lead to results, big we never question our attitude. Your attitude can be your glass ceiling. Fix it and watch how the glass begins to break before you even reach the top. 

I no longer look to be a copy of anyone else’s dream, but an original of my own. I no longer expect anything in return for what I put out, because my expectation can limit my blessing simply because my mind is thinking too small. I no longer worry if it is going to work out, I understand that it is already done, I just need to get to that place. 

Live your truth. Walk into your blessing. Get to your place. Be you. Do you. Tell your own story. On your own terms. 

The Vision 

I have had all of the materials I needed to complete my vision board since early January.  I was so enthusiastic about getting it done in the first few weeks, and had all intentions of showing mine off alongside all of the excellent examples on my timeline but I got sidetracked.  I cannot tell you exactly what I got sidetracked with because the list could go on forever.  It is now March 22 and I have finally completed my goal!

I read a few articles on Vision Boards, but I mostly just went with my heart and cut out things that meant something to me.  The areas I decided to cover are ones that are important to me.  Last year was the beginning of a transition to being fearless and intentional.  I stopped wishing and started doing.  I left all of the wishing behind and decided to take the necessary steps needed to achieve my goals.

This year has brought me to another level in my spirituality and faith.  I believe that I am where I am supposed to be, and I am going to do everything I said I was going to do.  So my vision board encompasses not just things I want, but people who I aspire to be like, things I want to give to others, and my true desire to travel more.

PEOPLE WHO INSPIRE ME 

This section covers 4 women who are doing exceptional things in the world and I am so inspired by their message and their truth.  I look forward to sitting across from Ellen, telling her how I started #BlackExcellenceSaturdays and how I am using social media as a tool to change the lives of many.

ESSENCE FESTIVAL 2015

I have been trying to get to Essence for years.  It is a very tough weekend to get out of town sometimes, so my plans have fallen through time and time again.  This year I am going to make a strong effort to get there.  I honestly want to be involved in the efforts to spread the word about healthcare prevention and the resources available across the nation. I have already put forth some efforts to make this happen!

MATERIAL WANTS

I am trying not to be focused on material wants, but there are a few things that I am going to enjoy when I obtain them. My husband gave me his car when I moved to Houston and has been driving my big Buick.  He is selling it since he will be traveling for the next year, but when he settles back home I am going to buy him his dream car, an Audi A8 (A4 in the picture, but you get the point).  I also will eventually need an upgrade, so I threw a new Lexus on there for myself.

As I expand my network, opportunities are presenting themselves that require a decent camera.  I have a lot to learn about the world of film, production, and editing, but the right tools are necessary to start the process.  My husband bought me the fragrance Flower Bomb a few years back and it is the best thing I have ever smelled. A new bottle would be greatly appreciated. (wink wink)

My husband and I did not have a wedding or a honeymoon.  We have never really had the money around our anniversaries to do anything special, but this year I want to change that.  We will make 3 years this July and we are planning something meaningful for ourselves, stay tuned.

STYLE

I have not focused much of my time or money on fashion, but I need to focus more on being a tad big stylish when I am out on the scene.  This is a work in progress and will be ongoing, because I struggle with spending money on clothes.  I have always been very practical and only purchased items that were very basic and plain.  It is time to live! Live in COLOR!

OUR NEXT HOME

After being in Houston for the past few months, I realized that I want to live in the city.  The ‘burbs are nice, but the things I enjoy the most are in the city of Houston.  Plus, the specialty schools are amazing in the city and I do believe my child will benefit from these experiences.

TRAVEL

Everyone says that they want to travel, but I am no longer wishing.  I want to be financially prepared for the next glitch fare.  We are actively making efforts to plan trips that will create memories.  My husband will be seeing the nation through his new position, but we plan to see more of the world together.  Kenya, South Africa, Brazil, Australia, Italy, and Germany are all on the lists of places to go.  Just waiting for the door to open and we will be flying through.

HEALTH/WELLNESS

I want clear skin.  Who doesn’t?

I am so unhappy with my current weight and I am struggling to find balance between work and caring for my son to get to the gym.  There are no excuses, but I am actively seeking out the time to get to the gym I want to join and to practice Bikram.  My biggest issue is childcare.  My family and friends don’t live close to either the gym or my house.  I will not stop trying to figure it out, until I have figured it out.

GIFTS/CELEBRATION

I want to use my gifts to help others and I want to be able to give wonderful gifts to those in need and whom I love.

My friends are doing big things here and across the world.  I hope to be able to celebrate with them soon.

This has been an amazing and eye opening experience.  I look forward to sharing my accomplishments that come from this post.  I love my life and cannot wait to do this again, with a new vision in place.

Until then. Be you. Do you. Tell your own story. On your own terms.

Here lies my first vision board: 

The Misconception of Womanhood

Over the past few weeks I have met some amazing women who are doing spectacular things.  The further I go in life, the more excited I am to be around successful women who are living out their dreams and creating their own lanes.  Society has focused on the conversation “Can Women Have It All?,” while women are out there having it all and some.  I have rarely walked into a room full of powerful women who were ever complaining about not having it all.

Yesterday I had the deepest revelation of my role in my marriage.  Despite the fact that I feel like I do so much, I realize I am able to do it and still enjoy everything in life.  I am able to balance motherhood, being a wife, cooking, cleaning, handling our finances, thinking for the future, all of my personal endeavors, and a few fun activities every now and then and never miss a beat.  Instead of resenting my ability to juggle it all, I am accepting my power and taking pride in who I am.

I have come to accept that who I am as a woman is not a burden or a strain, but how I was designed.  One of the faults with societal pressure is that all women are forced to feel that their lot in life is to do certain things, but in reality everyone was not created that way.  I applaud and admire any woman who decides not to be a mother, to not get married, or to live life outside the box of social norms.  That is their choice and they took control of their narrative instead of walking down an assumed path.  That does not make them less of a woman than me.  We are both as powerful individually and even more powerful together.

I am releasing the pressure to live within a box or to see the women around me as different because of the choices they have made.  Motherhood is amazing, but so was life prior to motherhood.  Being married is amazing, but so was the summer when I moved back to DC single and free.  We lived that summer honey. Juggling life is amazing, but so are quiet moments in the bed doing nothing.  No one writes the agenda for women, we are writing our own and taking pride in our decisions.

Women have been marginalized in so many areas of life, but as we break through barriers, glass ceilings, and kick down doors, everyone is starting to realize we always belonged in the room in the first place.  We are no longer asking for a seat at the table as a minority, but creating our own circles of power with women of like minds and spirits.  We have our own table. You can’t sit with us.  We are reclaiming our power and doing whatever we want.  There are no limits to who we are as women.  We were not made in a shadow, but in an image of greatness, excellence, and power.

I am who I am because I rejected the guilt of not being someone I was never designed to be.  I am where I am because I love myself for who I am.  I am going to another level because I am working with women who are fearless, flawless, and fierce.  We are woman, hear us roar.  This growth and connection is so natural.  We are not taking over, but stepping into our rightful places.

We are the history makers of tomorrow. Let’s make history. Be you.  Do you.  Tell your own story.  On your own terms.

My Life Your Entertainment

Who I was when I began this blog is not who I am today.  Over the past year I have transformed into someone I never knew existed or would have believed existed.  The transformation that has taken over my life is indescribable.  I thank God daily for my struggles and my triumphs, because all of it has created this cosmic energy of compassion and love. I do not do any of this for others, but for a greater purpose that I am only beginning to understand.

I have been through some very high highs and some very low lows.  I have been blessed to be able to process and absorb so many lessons, because I am not ashamed of my circumstances or hiding behind who people think I am or who they want me to be.  I convey my shortcomings and downfalls with very little to buffer the reality. I am a constant work in progress and I hope that people are bold enough to love me for me and foster my growth through this process.  I love me so much that no external dislike towards me or my journey can fill any space in my life.  There is no room for negativity.

I am not where I want to be, but I have a vision.  I move with a purpose, for a purpose, and on purpose.  I have spent this Lenten season focused on my energy and understanding the process of attracting what I want and need in life.  I am careful about who I allow in my presence, because it is important to maintain a certain level of energy in the work I do daily.  Keep watching because I will not stop until I have completed my assignments.

Be Excellent.Be you. Do you. Tell you own story. On your own terms.

What I Had to Go Through

People see you at various points of success within your life, but very few people see you in the midst of the process.  They see you as you enter into a challenge and many times won’t see you again until you are exiting that challenge. All of the tears, late nights, self-doubt, and conversations of quitting are not put on a display for the world to see.  Based on the images of the beginning and the end, many people assume that you have something special about you that others may not have.  Despite this perception and misconception, the only thing that makes me different from the next person is that I went through what I had to go through to get where I wanted to be.

Many times people ask for something and as they enter onto the path to get what they asked for, they self-destruct.  People turn around to go back to their comfort zone at the first sight of handwork, adversity, or stress.  Every person that is extremely successful today had to go through some dark moments.  Even those who we think woke up and had it all, still had to endure life to get to a place of peace, joy, or love.  We measure the success and happiness of others based on the materials that they possess instead of the characteristics that they have obtained.

I try to be as open as possible on here to share that this process is not always pretty.  Many times you try to smile through the pain, but it becomes overwhelming.  I am not perfect, my life is not perfect, and I am not done going through rough times because life will not stop because you remain stagnant.  Although I am in a happy place right now, this place has come with its own set of challenges and sacrifices.  I have wanted to turn back and return to my comfort zone, but my calling and my amazing support system has forced me to push through.

If you are truly yielding to your internal instinct and living life to the fullest, you are going to have to endure some painful moments.  You can never prepare for these moments, but you have to believe that they will pass.  If you get stuck in the middle of your journey, because you feel that your current state is your future state, then you will never make it to your next destination.  We assume that life will wait on us, but know that if a seed is placed in your life and you do not care for it, God will take that same seed and sow it into someone else’s life.

What I had to go through may not be what you had to go through, but we both had to go through something.  As we fight through this life to get to the next level, build people up as they navigate through their journey.  When you tear another person down when they are struggling to get to the next level, you are only removing the rungs from your own ladder and hindering your own progress.  You may never see what  I go through, but just know that I had to go through some things to get where I am.

This thing is bigger than me and because I am only a piece of the bigger picture I must remain diligent and steadfast.  Don’t focus on everyone’s picture perfect beginning and end, respect that there was a process even if you did not see it.  Don’t criticize what others have when those are the exact things that you want.  Get off of the side lines spectating at everyone else’s success and do what you have been called to do.

Your success is waiting on you. Be you.  Do you.  Tell your own story.  On your own terms.

Marriage Matters: What Marriage is Really Like (The Video)

I spent the last hour and a half having a dynamic conversation with some amazing women! We let our guard down and discussed the inner workings of a marriage and how we are dealing or have dealt with various issues in different stages of our relationship.  It was powerful to hear things about each other that we did not know.  It was powerful to hear how so much of our life has intersected at various points when we really didn’t even realize it.  We were vulnerable and we helped ourselves through our words and helped each other.  We went longer than I expected, but every moment was time well spent! Take a few moments to listen to various parts and share any feedback you may have! Marriage works, but it takes work.