This developed out of a conversation on Twitter where people were discussing poverty over various subject areas. Someone’s tweet struck a place in my spirit so I decided to share. Here is the Storify of my Tweets:
I started to write a blog about the entire situation and it got too deep for me to share. I unpacked too much too fast and it put me in a really emotional place so I decided not to share and table the in depth story for another time. In summation, I have a fear of going hungry or not having enough food, despite being removed from this situation for over 12 years. I cope with this issue by shopping at Costco and always having a full fridge. Although this seems simple, it goes so much deeper. One day I hope I will be strong enough to share the entire story.
In due time. Be you. Do you. Tell your own story. On your own terms.
This is the question I used to scream in the darkness of the night as I endured abuse, neglect and hunger. The question I asked God right after my father would tell me that I would never be anything when I grew up or that I was fat, stupid or dumb. A question that lingered every birthday, Christmas or major event my mother was never present at. I used to ask this question time and again but I would only hear silence in response. I never received an answer until I stopped asking.
I asked Why Me while in pain and many times while experiencing joy. I never felt that I should be where I was, good or bad. I felt that I should be somewhere else, that this life was not my own, that I should not have to be going through this or too unworthy to be experiencing that. But then one day I woke and stopped asking Why Me and started to live in the moment. I stopped feeling sorry for myself, I stopped apologizing for my past, present or future and I stopped feeling worthless. I was supposed to endure and survive, I was supposed to excel and succeed, I was supposed to be an example to others. Asking questions is great but your questions may prevent you from hearing the answer.
If you are not happy where you are, do not ask why me, but instead watch, listen and learn. You are there for a reason, you are there for a lesson, and you are there for someone else. So many have sacrificed their lives, livelihood and their safety so that we may be where we are today. It is not an easy concept to accept but it is a truth we have to live, own and use to empower. Instead of asking the Creator Why Me, ask yourself Why Me and you will see you are the only person prepared for the job.
I am using my past, pain and purpose to change the world. That is why he chose me because He knew I wouldn’t give up, I wouldn’t back down, and that I would take this world by storm! I only heard the answer when I stopped asking the question. Be you. Do you. Live in your truth. Tell your story. On your own terms.